This guest blog post was written by Chris Berg, a software developer from Hanover County.  He is married to his high school sweetheart, is a father of two, and has recently become an advocate for his nonbinary child who attends school in Hanover County.  

Up until this year, I’ve never been the kind of dad that showed up at School Board meetings.  I had never participated in a protest, never spoken at a School Board meeting, and I had never really talked to the school administration. This year, as my youngest child started their freshman year of high school in Hanover, all of that changed. My youngest child is a nonbinary student. That doesn’t make me love them any differently, but it completely changed how I show up for them.

I haven’t ignored what happens every day in school since my child came out. I know the kind of names my kid gets called. I know that teachers and administrators turn a blind eye when it happens. But this year has been different - this year our School Board is actively working against kids like mine who are transgender or nonbinary.  Time and time again, the School Board has not only made poor decisions but made obvious choices that indicate they do not care about my child. 

For me, it started in November of 2021. There was a School Board meeting scheduled to hear feedback from the community about the Virginia Department of Education’s (VDOE) model policies about the treatment of transgender and nonbinary students. Both of my kids wanted to go. This directly affected my youngest child and their friends and was something they were passionate about. We didn’t go to speak, just to show support and help represent the transgender and nonbinary students of Hanover. I honestly don’t know how the School Board could sit and listen to the students and parents who spoke at the meeting, describing what it felt like to be a transgender and nonbinary student in Hanover County, and not feel for them.

Despite there being a state law passed in 2020 requiring all 133 Virginia school districts to adopt policies consistent with or more comprehensive than the VDOE’s model policies before September 2021, Hanover decided in November to not even adopt their own, watered-down policy after they missed the mandated deadline. In December, they again ignored continued testimony from parents, students, and teachers and chose inaction over action. And then came March of 2022. This felt different, this wasn’t inaction - this felt like an attack. 

In March, the Hanover School Board voted to allow Alliance Defending Freedom (ADF) to provide them with free legal advice on their Equal Educational Opportunities Policy - a policy that directly affects transgender students in Hanover County. This is an organization responsible for anti-transgender legislation, anti-LGBTQ lawsuits, and that has earned the label of an anti-LGBTQ hate group from the Southern Poverty Law Center. Of all the groups that Hanover County could have chosen to provide assistance with their policies, this was the most offensive choice possible. There are any number of highly experienced groups, such as Equality Virginia and Side by Side Virginia, which would have provided Hanover advice, but they weren’t consulted. The School Board could not send a clearer signal that they have no respect for the transgender students of Hanover County. 

After the School Board’s actions in March, I started doing more than just attending meetings. I got in touch with other parents and I joined parent support groups who were interested in the same things. Our family participated in our first protest and my child subsequently received their first-ever suspension for the protest. I have spoken in support of the VDOE model policies at a Board of Supervisors meeting and two School Board meetings, yet both continue to ignore my ask that my child be treated with the dignity and respect they deserve.

That brings me to today. It’s the end of the 2021-2022 school year.  With the exception of a small change to allow students to register their name and pronouns with the school, school policies regarding transgender students remain unchanged. Hanover County is still breaking the law. They’re still consulting with ADF regularly for legal advice. Despite there being extensive, well-written guidelines provided by the Virginia Board of Education, transgender and non-binary students of Hanover County are still subjected to discrimination and stigmatization.

Some students are lucky enough to have someone in their life that is supportive and has the time and knowledge to fight with the school to make small changes for them. But, without policies in place, students who aren’t in this situation continue to view their school as a hostile environment.

To the students who don’t feel safe at school, or who don’t have a safe space to go, I want you to know this. Despite the harsh realities of this year, there is an active group in Hanover County that continue to advocate for you. There are parents, teachers, allies, and students in Hanover who are and will continue to fight for you. We are as much a part of Hanover as anyone else who lives here. This isn’t just about bathroom access. We are committed to ensuring a safe school environment - one that includes transgender and non-binary students.

Last week, the U.S. Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade in a shameful ruling that decimated access to abortion. Adding insult to injury, this unprecedented assault on our fundamental rights and bodily autonomy took place during Pride month. Abortion access should concern everyone, and this ruling directly impacts everyone who can become pregnant. That’s why so many LGBTQ+ people are deeply invested in the fight for abortion access.

There is, of course, the obvious answer: women. Cisgender women have abortions more than any other group of people. There is plenty of data to back this up. Abortion among women who can become pregnant is extremely common and nearly one in four women will have an abortion in their lifetime. The vast majority of data available about abortions and abortion access surveys women. That data tells us that the average person who gets an abortion is a woman of color who is already a mother and who lives at or below the federal poverty level.

The more expansive and more accurate answer is anyone who can become pregnant needs to be able to get an abortion if they need or want one, including many cisgender women, some non-binary people, some intersex people, some Two Spirit people, and some trans men.

As a bisexual transgender non-binary person, I can become pregnant. I am not a woman — and yet, I could need access to abortion care. I also know that I never want to be pregnant. For me, access to abortion would be a matter of lifesaving health care. When trans people articulate the need for access to abortion services, or that we have accessed abortion care in the past, these experiences are often dismissed by those who want to deny that more people than just cisgender women need abortion. But we’re here, we’ve been here, and we’re not going anywhere.

The fight for abortion rights and LGBTQ+ rights go hand in hand because they are both ultimately about protecting our bodily autonomy. But they’re also intertwined because lesbians, bisexuals, trans people, queer people and yes, some trans gay men, can experience pregnancy and deserve control over if, when, and how we become pregnant, and whether or not we stay pregnant.

Photo by Zach D Roberts/NurPhoto via AP

When conversations about abortion reduce it to a “women’s issue” or an issue only for people who can carry pregnancies, we exclude a wide swath of people.

There is a tendency to exclude men, without an acknowledgment that some trans men can become pregnant and despite the fact that cisgender men are not the only people who can’t become pregnant. Trans women, cisgender women who struggle with infertilty, some intersex people, some trans men, some non-binary people, and some Two Spirit people all cannot become pregnant.

Protest signs and messages often use the framing of “no uterus, no opinion,” ignoring that there are many cisgender women who have and have not carried pregnancies who have had hysterectomies and no longer have a uterus. Hysterectomies are, in fact, the second most common surgery for cisgender women.

Centering who gets to have opinions about abortion around whether or not people are currently able to become pregnant excludes people from our understanding of abortion rights, rather than expanding it.

In the same breath, we must acknowledge that the systems and structures involved in banning abortion are focused on restricting the rights of women and the rights of trans people. Over 300 anti-trans and anti-LGBTQ bills have been proposed in state legislatures just in 2022, and over 20 new anti-trans bills have become law over the past three years. In the same period of time, 541 of restrictions aimed at pushing abortion out of reach have been proposed and 38 have become law.

Nearly all of these bills politicize our bodily autonomy and access to essential, life-saving health care. Trans affirming health care and abortion are both already hugely expensive medical procedures, often not covered by health insurance. Both are often prohibited from being covered by insurance under state laws.

For trans people, laws in some states prohibit access to gender affirming care, particularly for youth, or worse, criminalize parents who allow their children to access this care. For people who need abortion care, there are legal restrictions that prohibit insurance coverage, enforce long waiting periods for time-sensitive care, and other medically unnecessary barriers.

Any way you slice it, diving into the politics of both abortion access and trans rights requries people who may need an abortion and trans people to be ready to debate why we need access safe, common medical procedures that will save our lives. It is, quite frankly, exhausting to repeatedly ask for acknowledgment of a shared experience, especially one that can be so medically life-altering.

Our bodies are our own. Our health care choices are ours to make. And abortion and gender-affirming care are our right.